Phoenix 2010

We are honored to stand on the side of love in Phoenix.

I will concede that it was an unusual way to spend three days of my vacation.  Unusual, but not in the least regrettable.  My husband and I decided to answer the call of my colleague, the Rev. Susan Fredrick-Gray, of the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Phoenix, to stand, march, and witness events surrounding the enactment of SB1070.  Over the past several years I have participated in justice work related to marriage equality, the human right to water, and moral budgeting.  I've marched in parades, in protests, have lobbied elected officials, have phone banked, stood in silent witness, chanted while standing on corners of busy intersections, and attended town hall meetings.  All of the causes were important and all of the work changed me in some way.  But nothing compared to my time in Phoenix, now one week ago.

No, I was not arrested.  I was there from Wed. afternoon to early Fri. morning; participating in just a few of the planned activities.  Yes, it was stifling hot and humid, at times uncomfortable, intimidating, and alternately wearying and energizing.  I keep reminding myself that I was there, in the thick of things, for just a matter of hours!  I had a very small taste of what day-to-day living is like for many people in Arizona.  And let's face it, SB1070 is about much more than Arizona.  The people affected by our broken immigration system are all over our country.  They are residents and undocumented; men, women, and children; employers and employees.

The stories being shared by my friends, colleagues, and those whose names I don't know but who stood on the side love last week in Phoenix, are deeply moving.  I encourage you to visit uua.org and standingonthesideoflove.org to get a glimpse.  

Standing with my San Diego colleagues in Phoenix.

This is my experience in a nutshell.  Nearly one hundred of us (clergy and laity) gathered on Wed. afternoon.  It was a gathering of greeting, singing, sharing apprehensions, excitement, and learning how we might be effective over the next couple of days.  The training around civil disobedience was powerful.  I did not realize that entering the United States without having gone through the proper immigration procedures is not a crime. That's right.  It is not a crime punishable by our criminal justice system.  It is a civil offense.  I also had not known that along with SB1070 going into effect on July 29, albeit with some of the most offensive and oppressive pieces removed just a day earlier, some other interesting laws were enacted in Arizona on July 29:  you can now purchase liquor at 6am on Sundays, and there's no need for a permit to carry an unconcealed weapon!  Hm-m-m-m.  It was going to be an interesting couple of days.

Standing near the demonstrators in front of Arpaio's office.

Rev. Peter Morales, Pres. of the UUA stands in front of the county jail shortly before being arrested.

On Thurs. morning we marched alongside hundreds of people of all ages, colors, and backgrounds.  We made our way to the Wells Fargo building where Sheriff Joe Arpaio's office is located.  The first demonstration took place in the street in front of that building and I made my decision not get arrested but to witness and stand in support of those who did, and on behalf of those who are most directly affected by SB1070.  News media from all over the globe seemed to be everywhere I turned.  Police in riot gear started flocking to the scene of the demonstration and that's when I saw my former congregant, Mar Cardenas, arrested.  She wasn't part of the demonstration but had stepped into the street to take a picture.  As Mar is a Latina woman  I found myself greatly fearing for her safety.  My heart was racing.  She was the first of many of my friends and colleagues that would be arrested that day.   There were moments when I was overwhelmed with emotion as I imagined the terror felt by children whose undocumented parents are taken away from them; the law enforcement officials who struggle with the moral issues their job presents on a daily basis; the daunting work that needs to be done to open the hearts and minds of so many around this issue and all issues of social justice.

It was at the 4th Ave. County Jail where we arrived to intoxicating drumbeats and chanting coming from a group of young local protesters, and we witnessed another demonstration.  I saw my colleague, Rev. Susan, and our denominational president, Peter Morales, along with a handful of others, blocking an entrance to the jail.  At one point an Asian woman standing next to me asked if I would be willing to join her standing behind the demonstrators for a little while with our standing on the side of love signs.  I agreed and we did.  As my husband and I left the scene shortly before Susan, Peter, and the others were arrested we headed for our car and were thanked by two passersby on the sidewalk.  Neither of the two said anything other than "thank you:", but they each said it with a level of sincerity that left me with nothing to say.  I simply gave a nod.  I knew from that simple "thank you" that while our time in Phoenix was done our work must continue. 

I kept updated throughout the remainder of the day, and into the next, via Facebook posts.  We left Phoenix early on Fri. morning knowing that some of those we had marched and stood with had been released from jail, and others were still waiting to be arraigned.  My husband and I left Phoenix anxious to be safely back in our home; anxious to hug our teenage son and hold our family tight.  We talked about how blessed we are and how we must not forget that there is much work to be done by Anglo allies like ourselves. 

Some people have said there was victory in Judge Bolton's ruling.  I would say it is a small step in the right direction but to claim victory is to say "it's over".  It is not.  Some, like Sheriff Joe, according to the accounts of some of my colleagues, have said "Why are you here (Phoenix) risking arrest for a bunch of Mexicans?"  I would say those are my sisters and brothers and as a person of faith I am called to stand with and for those who are oppressed, vulnerable, and marginalized.   Some, like a few of my own relatives, have said "Standing on the side of love?  Love of what?  Lawlessness?"  I would say that standing on the side of love is about love for each and every one of us, for we all have inherent worth and dignity. And I would say, yes, the immigration system is in severe disrepair and desperately needs to be reformed.  But without a foundation of compassion and respect from which to work from, we are doomed to become a society of disposable people and hardened hearts. I can't help but wonder sometimes if we aren't already there. 

Because something is "the law" or legal doesn't make it moral. Can you say Jim Crow Laws and slave holding?  How about corporate financing of politicians?  Make no mistake, I do know that there are many sides to the immigration issue and many good people on those sides, but as I continue to choose to stand on the side of love,  I will also choose to show compassion and respect to those who disagree with me.

I was told recently, with regard to my involvement in the events in Phoenix, that "Love is not a solution. It's just an excuse for another agenda".  My response is that love is the only solution.   No excuses.  As a person of faith I am called to stand on the side of love today, tomorrow, and for all of my days.  What about you?  Christians, tell me what would Jesus do? And Buddhists, what would Buddha do? What would Krishna, Gandhi, or Chief Seattle do? 

There is more love, hope, and joy somewhere and I'm gonna keep on til I find it.

Holy Moments

You might not consider it a holy moment, being in a room with nearly 4,000 people. You might think it impossible to experience something holy browsing alongside several hundred other people in an exhibit hall filled with book distributors, representatives from theological schools, gift vendors galore, and more Unitarian Universalist affinity groups than I can even recall.  And yet, somehow it was.

Our lives are filled with holy moments.  Not all joyful, but most certainly holy.  If you're not familiar with the musical artist, Peter Mayer, or more specifically with his song Holy Now, check out the link to hear his voice and read the moving lyrics:

http://thegreatstory.org/video/holy-now.mp4       

I attend my denomination's annual General Assembly each year, arriving a few days early, along with other religious professionals (several hundred of us), before the thousands of laypersons arrive. It was in that time, during a beautiful worship service, that the idea of recognizing holy moments in our everyday lives was introduced. My colleagues and I reflected on the holy moments that we experience as ministers.  Like the time I rehearsed some music for a Sunday service with Richard & Elaine (my favorite old time musicians).  The three of us sat in the sanctuary on a quiet weekday morning for nearly two hours, just singing and singing. With Richard on his banjo, Elaine on guitar, and our voices melding together in sweetness and harmony.  It was a holy moment.  My colleagues and I also thought about the holy moments we experience in our lives outside the church – with family, in nature, the quiet respites.

The holy moments in our lives are all about connections; relationships with each other, with the stranger, with our mother earth, with our own souls and best selves. Our lives are filled with holy moments as we connect and deepen relationships. This isn't a new revelation for me.  It probably isn't new for you either.  Funny how it took a gathering in Minneapolis of nearly 4,000 Unitarian Universalists to reintroduce me to the idea that everything, everything, everything is holy now.   I'm spending time recognizing the lovely, challenging, painful, and joyful holy moments in my life - everyday.  What are some of the holy moments in your everyday life?

New Hope for Humanism

I've just about finished a book that I don't want to finish.  By that I mean that I don't want the book to end.  It's not a great novel or classic piece of literature.  It's "Good Without God" by Greg M. Epstein.  Is is the best book I've ever read?  No, definitely not.  I've read alot of really great books over the years but this book is particularly timely for our society, and has been timely for me personally as well.  This book brings me joy as it breathes a new breath of life into Humanism as a faith.  Yes, that's right, a faith!. 

At the Unitarian Universalist Association's General Assembly last month in Minneapolis, my husband and I (both avowed Humanists) had the pleasure of seeing and hearing Mr. Epstein speak about his book.  I picked up a copy of the book even before hearing him.  What peaked my interest was finding out that Greg Epstein is the Humanist chaplain at Harvard University.  Who knew?!   And what a fascinating and exciting concept. 

Just knowing that there is a growing group of young Humanists who, with the guidance of their chaplain, are engaging with one another and with those who are not Humanists, in acts of compassion to better the world, gives me new hope.  It gives me new and much needed hope for a Humanism that I have come to know through Unitarian Universalism.  I am deeply grateful for having discovered Humanism and being able to finally put a name to the faith I have embraced for so many years of my life.   Unfortunately though, that Humanism has, in my experience, been largely angry, overly cynical, dull, and crusty (and not like a loaf of fresh bread!).   It is a sad tale of unhappiness, and fear that Christianity is 'taking over' the denomination.   I am sorry to say that too many Humanists I have known have belittled their theist sisters & brothers; missing incredible opportunities to work together transforming the world, and maybe just being transformed in the process. 

Humanism is a faith that is alive and beautiful.  For me, Humanism is faith in humanity; celebrating our strengths and being humbled by our inadequacies.  It puts the onus on each and every one of us to make this world a place worth inhabiting.  It denies the supernatural but admits that we don't know everything.  This is the faith that speaks to me, challenges me, and sustains me.  I encourage theists and humanists alike to read Epstein's book, but especially the humanists.  Read it and smile!  Read it and be joyful in and about your faith!

Grep Epstein claims:  "Humanism offers a comfort and hope that affirms our ability to live ethical lives of personal fulfillment, aspiring together for the greater good of all."    Amen, chaplain.  And blessed be!

The Power Of A Hug

A dear couple from my congregation recently sent me a message that let me know they cared about me and were always available to give me a hug.  This message came just a couple of weeks after I formally announced my resignation as minister of the congregation.  It is a time of loss and grief for me and for many in the congregation, so you might imagine my joy at receiving such a message from congregants.  And then, embedded in the message was this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=hN8CKwdosjE
Please take the time to watch it, or re-watch it if you've seen it before.  Send it to anyone you know who could use a hug and isn't in close enough proximity for you to give them a hug in person.  The power of a hug cannot be overstated.

It saddens me that because of sexual harrassment and fear of inappropriate touching our society is fast becoming hugless!  I'm not convinced that a hugless society is a safe society.  There's a plethora of scientific studies that proclaim the value and importance of human touch in the lives of those who live alone, those with disabilities, the elderly, and children.   We could all use a hug now and again! 

In seminary I was told that giving my congregants hugs was something I needed to be careful about.  I understand the reasoning behind the cautionary advice, and I am always aware of my role as minister, but I am not willing to be hugless.  I couldn't agree more that giving an unwanted hug is definitely not a good idea!  But from my experience, both personal and professional,  asking for permission either verbally or simply by opening your arms will most often result in a hug.  If a hand is extended I know that a hand-hug will have to do.
  
Joy can be found in connecting with another person and a simple hug has the potential and power to bring joy to life.  I plan to give and receive more hugs.  I'm not promising to stand in the town square with a "Free Hugs" sign, but you never know!

Give a hug today.  Feel the joy that a hug can bring!

Let It Go

So much to blog about - So little time!   This is simply my way of saying there is so much going on, with so many opportunities to find joy.  This is not to say that much of what seems to be "going on" in many of our lives feels chaotic, uncertain, or confusing.  Change is everywhere!   The big question is how do we handle change?  How do you handle change? 
In a recent sermon I spoke about change as transition, and the need to let go in order to be open to the possibilities that will present themselves as a result of change.  I didn't say that letting go was easy.  Letting go is a practice that requires intentionality and faith.  I'm referring to faith as trust - trust in your best self, trust in those you love, trust in the universe and whatever you consider the Great Mystery or Divine in your life.
One of the most common quotes used in situations of loss, change, and transition, comes from poet Mary Oliver:
To live in this world you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal, to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it, and, when the times comes to let it go, to let it go.
I must admit that I am learning to let go.  It's a difficult practice for me, but I know that it is a necessary practice.  There is humility in letting go; a humility that most of us could use a little more of.  So many lessons in the practice of letting go.  I'd love to hear about your struggles and successes with letting go, change, and the opportunities that open through transition.
May you know joy in your letting go and on the other side of transition!

Juggling Life

Life is nothing short of a juggling act - a juggling act that begins when we are children, juggling friends, music lessons, sport practice, schoolwork.  That juggling act becomes more complex as we take on more roles and responsibilities.  Sometimes we feel like we’re juggling giant glass balls, or dangerously sharp knives, or huge fire torches.   The stress can seem overwhelming as we struggle to keep everything moving through the air.  We can’t let even one fall or there will be disaster – glass will shatter, knives will cut, fire will burn, someone will be hurt. And there are days, or weeks, or months, when we feel like the acrobat on the high wire juggling chain saws! Talk about a disaster waiting to happen. A popular website for jugglers has as its slogan: "Keep throwing up"! And that’s exactly what it feels like sometimes when we're in the throws (no pun intended) of juggling.

Let's face it, we will always juggle, whether it's just 2 balls or 20.  And so there is a deep need for balance in that juggling.  A need for balance in our lives.   The famous opera singer, Jessye Norman, has said "Problems arise in that one has to find a balance between what people need from you and what you need for yourself."  I am working on that balance in my own life and know that it is no easy task.  It's a balance that can require big decisions and possible transitions.  The process of finding that balance can be painful in the short run.  I've never been fond of the catch phrase 'no pain no gain', and yet I find it to be too true in many of life's situations. 

One of my favorite descriptions of balance comes from author Anne Morrow Lindbergh (Gift of the Sea).  Lindbergh describes balance as "an alternating rhythm between… solitude and communion, between retreat and return."   There is joy to be found in balance; in that alternating rhythm. 
May we all know that joy.

Big decisions

Sometimes life's journey presents a stretch of road that requires big decision-making.  I'm talking about life changing, or at least tweaking, capital "B", big decisions.  It's the fork in the road that has your stomach doing flip flops ad nauseam (literally)!  I  imagine that most of us don't have to face those big decisions too often.  But when we do, it's not typically a joyous task.  It can be arduous, gut-wrenching, sometimes heart breaking, and even a bit depressing.  O, Joy, where art thou?

Joy may not be in the moment of discerning where to turn in the road, but joy is in seeing how far along the road you've already come, breathing in the present moment of life, and looking ahead to the possibilities further down the road.

There is no guarantee that the decision to take one path over another will be successful.  Without doubt it will hold opportunities for mistakes.  But somewhere along the path joy will spring anew.  I'm going to keep my eyes and heart open.  How do you face those big decisions in your life and where in that process do you find joy?